16 & Let’s Look-Maintaining Friendships

Before I get into this post today, I’ve gotta wish…

this sweet girl a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! My goodness time flies and I could tear up just thinking about how quickly the last sixteen years have gone by. I’m so thankful for Ebby Lee, for her life, for her kindness, for her sweet spirit, for her laughs, for her shopping abilities, for her love of Jesus, and for the front row seat I’ve been given to watch her grow into the young woman she’s become. HAPPY SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAY! We LOVE YOU!!

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Hey Hey Hey!

I’m back this week! I missed you on Monday. I tagged along to Scottsdale with Tab on a quick work trip and was MIA on Monday. We got into town crazy late last night and I’m popping in today to share a new Let’s Look with Shay. This topic is near and dear to my heart because I think it’s something women my age STRUGGLE with! Before we dive into the topic today, let’s do a quick recap…

January-We covered our Low Level Goals. These are the goals that will make us feel productive but aren’t anything too difficult. I’m happy to report one item has already been crossed off my list!

February-We shared how we Work on our Marriage.

March-We discussed how we Reset for the Week.

Today we’re looking at MAINTAINING FRIENDSHIPS! I mentioned I think this is something women my age struggle with because honestly, I sure do! At every other stage of my motherhood life, I’ve been able to meet friends for baby play dates, join with friends on sports teams, plan things with my friends who also had kids so it became a big hang out, and it was just really easy to do. But this stage of life is MUCH HARDER!

It’s harder because our house is in that stage of life where our kids are going seven different directions, everyone needs a ride, I feel like my time with everyone under one roof is so limited, and I’m very fragile about when I miss nights at home with the kids. I think I hit that high school hump and immediately realized how quickly time goes. Not only am I trying to balance mom/wife/work life but throw in time with friends as well!

I’m by NO MEANS an expert on this subject because it’s BY FAR the hardest stage with maintaining friendships I’ve experienced to date, but these are some of my suggestions…

1. Give your friends grace! I need grace when I don’t text or call for months and they deserve grace too. Just like I mentioned this stage of life is crazy for me, it’s also crazy for my friends.
2. Find time that works and make that happen. Right now it’s really hard for me to get away for a dinner with friends on a week night but it’s much easier for me to meet a friend for lunch. I can squeeze some extra minutes out of my work day for a longer lunch, meet a friend, and voila!
3. Walk, walk, walk. On this work trip I tagged along on, the wives and I were doing a lot of perimenopause chatting. That topic is everywhere, right? We’re supposed to eat ALL the protein, WALK, drink lots of water, WALK, lift heavy weights, and WALK some more. We joked that getting those daily steps in can often feel like a part-time job! I love meeting a friend to walk. We catch up AND we both get steps in for the day. Plus I can mark the walk off my to do list! I often will talk to a friend on the phone while I walk as well if meeting in person doesn’t work.
4. Make the special days more important. Like I said, it’s hard for me to get away for a night out during the week. We have baseball games, baseball practice, softball practice, team dinners and more. So often if friends are meeting on a random night for dinner, I have to skip. BUT, I do try extra hard to make it to a birthday dinner or a celebration. Those are much fewer and farther between so I prioritize those more. Plus, I want my friends to know that while I’m in a busy season of life they still are important to me and mean so much.
5. Make the time to check-in! I could be SO MUCH BETTER about this! But we’re all a work in progress, right? I get bogged down with my life and forget to check in with others…just like my friends do as well. It’s a fine line because while I can see my days are limited with my kids at home, I also don’t want to be a friend who goes MIA for years and years only to emerge from my kids all leaving the nest and have no friends left!
6. Engage with those around you. I try to befriend other moms on our sports’ teams, other moms in the bleachers, other moms you see at carpool pick up. A kind word and simple smile can go a long way!

What about YOU?! What suggestions do you have for maintaining friendships?! I’d love to hear!

Next month we’re sharing our WELLNESS ROUTINES! Hope you join us!

XO